Queen Bees & Wannabes by by Rosalind Wiseman: Summary and reviewsToday is Apologies Day in Rosalind Wiseman's class -- so, naturally, when class lets out, the girls are crying. Not all 12 of them, but a good half. They stand around in the corridor, snuffling quietly but persistently, interrogating one another. And it's gonna be hard for her too, because if she doesn't do what they want her to do, the popular girls are gonna chuck her out, and they're gonna spread rumors about her or tell people stuff she told them. Wiseman's class is about gossip and cliques and ostracism and just plain meanness among girls. But perhaps the simplest way to describe its goals would be to say that it tries to make middle-school girls be nice to one another.
Queen Bees and Wannabes – Book Review
I was somewhat disappointed with the general attitude that the terrible issues addressed in the book are inevitable with preteen and teen girls. The book offers some good advice for parents to navigate raising a teen. Computers in my house have passwords and filters installed and I monitor usage. I have open discussions with my children about social media and websites and the online world. I actually learn a lot from them.
Wiseman Defending Ourselves: Prevention, Self-Defense, and Recovery from Rape , offers parents a guide to navigating the adolescent landscape. Acting as a liaison between "Girl World" and "Planet Parent," Wiseman helps parents understand their daughters' friendships, the power of cliques and the roles of girls within them including Queen Bee, Sidekick, Torn Bystander, Messenger and Target. The second half concentrates on boys, sex and drugs as well as what to do if your daughter needs professional help. Within each chapter, "Check Your Baggage" sections challenge parents to recognize their own biases and remember what it was like when they were teens; as well, Wiseman offers scripts for discussing difficult issues and advice on how to deal with them. The author also forthrightly addresses the issue of homosexuality.
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We Are Debunkers
I read this book several years ago; I loved it then and I continue to recommend it to parents as a great guide to understanding the world of girls. I also saw Rosalind Wiseman speak in person several years ago, and I found her to have a down to earth, practical and reasonable approach to working with kids in these tough relational situations. Cliques can start forming in elementary school, and this book is a great guide to understanding all the dynamics that happen within one. While there are some topics in this book that are geared for more teen concerns like dating, I still find it to be a great read for parents with younger girls. The whole book has good information to know and you can always go back and revisit once they are experiencing those issues.